Shift

My two year old climbed out of her crib last week.  Three times.  We told her to stop.  It didn't work. We didn't want her to break her arm continuing to practice her pole vaulting skills out of her crib.  I didn't know that last Thursday night would be the last time I put one of my babies in a crib.  Now, she has adjusted, after one week of a bit of the battle of the wills...to her new toddler bed.

I still watch her fall asleep, that baby of mine.  Those sweet round cheeks, perfect nose and lips. Those long lashes brushing her little face.  That last little baby of mine.

My two year old is also practicing the art of potty training.  I am not sure when the last diaper will be used, but it is coming.  It is strange, but I will miss changing my babies' diapers, even.  Yes, even that.

My five year old got a letter about Kindergarten.  I have seven more months with him at home (not that I am counting or anything).  I want to savor every last minute of him being my baby boy, being at home with his mama.  He is adding and subtracting.  He is reading.  He is not napping in the afternoon.  He is seeking more, more than what I can teach him.  I see that he is ready for Kindergarten, but am I?

My eight year old has completed his first Diorama.  It has a full on "report" with it.  He is also getting ready to be in the "big leagues" for baseball with upcoming practice 2 nights a week with a game on the weekend.  He is no longer happy to tag along on our old adventures around Durham.  He still does it, but he has grown out of the mall play area, the train and Lego tables at Barnes and Nobles and almost the Chick-fil-a play area...sigh...such great great memories of those days with my littles.

I always imagined getting married and then having babies...but really, I didn't imagine much past that.  I didn't really imagine myself getting yelled at by my 8 year old that "That's not fair".  I didn't imagine my 5 year old passing up a one on one date with dear old mom in favor of watching football with his dad.  I didn't imagine my 2 year old little girl throwing a temper tantrum in the middle of the bowling alley while my 5 year old panicked about how to get the ball down the alley and my 8 year old pitched an all mighty fit about not winning.  Nope, didn't imagine those fun times...

When you have your last baby and you see that baby growing up and asserting her little self, you realize that you are now surrounded by little humans who have opinions that need molding and guiding...not little babies that think you are the best thing since sliced bread.  And, that molding and guiding...it takes a lot, I mean a lot, of work.

Before too long, there will be no more greeting me every morning with a big goofy happy grin with sweet little curls and giggles.  No more running to hug me when I walk in the room.  No more making me feel like the mom I try to be and imagined I would be.

I only say this because I have already seen it happen twice, this shift.  My sweet boys turned "teenagery" - overnight.  (definitely not saying they don't ever hug their mama or cuddle in my lap still- it's just not as frequent as when they were littler!)

I am training for my first half marathon.  Fitting, I'd say, amidst some real shifts going on in my home and heart.  As I inch up the miles I run, week by week, I am getting stronger and stronger.  My muscle memory is growing.  My stamina is growing.  My resolve is growing.  Much like mothering babies to toddlers to waddlers to preschoolers to Kindergartners to Third graders to...not yet there...yep, not yet at 13.1 miles...but I will be.

The great thing is that each mile, each step, each phase, God gives me what I need for that time.  He doesn't give it to me any sooner.  And I can't slow it down or rush it, no matter how hard I try either way.

I can enjoy the ride, though.  And, I can live into each moment I am given with these precious little ones.

This mothering.  It is a tender blessing.  It is a snapshot into heaven.  Shift or no shift, I love this calling that I can only do with God's great grace and mercy, one day at a time.

Massenutten 2015 and Back to "Normal"

I love this girl.  I love this picture and that it was taken in one of our very favorite places to visit.  We try to have a yearly couples weekend with Mike and Allison, sans kids.  We have been able to make it happen most years, five kids between us.  It is such a special time of bonding and catching up for our souls.  Though we don't get to see each other nearly as much as we would like, these weekends away certainly do make up for it.

We laughed, we cried, we shopped, we stayed up late talking, we stayed up late playing a board game.  We ate out, we slept in.  We encouraged, we reminisced.  We had a break.  We were able to breathe.  We loved.  What a gift.

Mike and Stan played golf and watched a lot of sports.  They did shop the flea market and Finders Keepers with us...this picture was taken right before we started our "Battle of the Sexes" game.  It was hilarious.

I see why Mike and Stan picked the seats they did...see the sports on behind us!  :)

Mike and Allison acting out their word...and planning up strategy.

Me laughing at the word I got to act out...

And, Mike, upset that I beat him in the demo...

We will keep that word between us...  hahaha.

Alas, the men won.  I do think that they got some really easy breaks...until next time Mike and Stan!

Our crew.  What an awesome time we had.  I never laugh so hard than when we are with Mike and Allison.  What special friends.

------------------------------------------------------

We headed home on Monday, MLK.  God bless my parents who kept my three sick children that entire weekend.  They knew that I needed a break and that Stan and I needed some time away.  

Life sure can get tedious.  We had just gotten over about 8 weeks straight of some illness in one or more of us, Stan travelling, Christmas, New Year's and Landon's birthday- all along with me trying to start training for my first half marathon March 28th and keep up with life in general with three kids and a part time (demanding) job.  It was a whirlwind.

Let's not even address the fact that the kids tend to have behavior issues around the holidays and Landon was really struggling in school.  The break was very much needed and I am not sure how I would have gotten through the two weeks that followed without it (except that I do know and am so reminded that I always have the Lord to lean on). 

Nothing like seeing your child suffer will make you realize your need for God more.  Feeling that helpless, knowing that I cannot DO anything to take away his struggles at any given moment, forces me out of myself and into the Lord's presence, begging him for help.

I think we are on the right track and I am thankful that I have been heard and that Landon has the support of his teachers and the staff at his school.  I never realized what an advocate I would have to be for my child.  

Makes me think a lot about how much the Lord fights for me.

My love for Landon (and Connor and LJ) pales in comparison to my Heavenly Father's love for me and for them. Not only does he fight for me, he let his own son die for me.  He loves Landon even more than I do and made him just the way he is, just for me and Stan.  

How humbling, how encouraging, how real.

------------------------------------------------------

We raced home from the bus stop yesterday and had to grab some hot chocolate.  This is our "normal", our safe place.  Hot chocolate with marshmallows, by the fire...yep, that says home to my three!

-----------------------------------------------------

I had to put these in a BLOG, I mean...really?  Could she be any cuter?  This was the first day she wore pigtails.

And, another "normal" for us, is when we take off on a Tuesday morning for an adventure...

Lindsay Jane playing with dominoes in a bucket.  Kept her happy for at least 20 minutes! :)

Connor playing Crayon Physics...

Connor and Lindsay spelling on a big peg board.

Showing off their dance moves!

And, master building...what a fun morning with my two littles!

Well, there is a snap shot back into our "normal".  Day by day, the Lord shows us his mercies, which are new every morning....  I am so very thankful to have these three little nuggets. And their sweet and wonderful daddy, of course.

Landon Turns Eight!

The above affirmations came from an afternoon of practicing writing, Landon being the teacher to his two younger siblings.  Seeing the wonderful things he wrote made me so very proud to know that he loves and appreciates his family.  We try really hard to promote a team feeling in our family and make the kids feel like they are a very integral part to our family team.  I got this idea from our fabulous youth pastor several years ago when Stan and I participated in a Sunday School class that was really for parents of teens and we just had Landon and were pregnant with Connor.  It was so very helpful to think about things to be proactive instead of reactive in our parenting.  The pearls we took from that one series of classes have been quite instrumental even thus far...and we don't yet have even tweenagers!!

Now, I will get on with the birthday celebrations, but the above paragraph is really where I start giving thanks for our eight year old.  We have had a hard school year or two and focusing on his value in our family has been a big deal around here.  If you have ever had a child struggle in school, you can relate.  It hurts a parent's heart. a. lot.  But, I have faith that God, in his infinite wisdom, planned for Landon (and us) to have these struggles, to teach us things that we would otherwise not know.

As I write this BLOG, 23 days after his birthday, I reflect on all that has happened this month and how even in those 23 days we all have grown.

Landon, the morning of his 8th birthday!  It was a Sunday and we had just had the GI bug run through everyone except for Stan, who was sick this morning.  We stayed home from church and kept our germs to ourselves.

I decorated the downstairs and obviously, Lindsay Jane, was excited/surprised!!

We let Landon open a few gifts that morning.  In this picture, he was reading his card to his brother.  He was actually really interested in the cards and what they said.  I loved that.

Here, Connor was giving Landon a birthday hug.  So sweet.

Here is a picture of him during the opening process of his gift from his brother, a Skylander to "share".

This next series of pictures cracks me up. You see...I ordered a birthday cake for Landon's party, that consisted of 20 people, adults and children total, that was to be at a pizza restaurant.  I was thinking...no stress for mom this year.  Well, the morning Landon's party was scheduled, Landon threw up...and we had to cancel the party until his actual birthday, the 4th...which, as I previously mentioned, Stan got sick on.  So, we also had to cancel it that day and postpone it until the following Saturday night.  Not at all a popular decision.

Well, I figured, for his actual birthday, I would go pick up the cake and we could share it (and all our germs) with our family.  I went to Harris Teeter to pick it up.  It was a cake made for 100 people, not 25.  So, it was an entire sheet, not a quarter of a sheet like I had ordered.  I just laughed.  They did not make me pay for it, as it was not what I ordered, but what in the world was I going to do with a cake made for 100 people?

We lit it...

Admired it...

Presented it...

Had our neighbors, Porter and Sam come over and stand outside the threshold of germs...and sing.

Landon was soooooo excited!!!!

That, when he blew out the candles...

He spit all over the cake being silly...so much for sharing the cake made for 100 people with 100 people, unless those people wanted the GI bug that had been hanging out at our house for the past 10 days.  Oye.

Happy 8th Birthday to my silly, energetic, sensitive, baseball-loving, faith-filled, extroverted firstborn.  His exuberance for life and love of his family and God is a true blessing.  He is bigger than life, most of the time, and this quality can be hard to parent...but I would not change him.  He is making me better a better me every day.

More germs...but all for us.  :)

My happy little boy.

And, little girl!

Time for more presents!

And more cake, if you are Lindsay Jane...

More reading cards! (love!)

And, my little buddy requested a "Science Kit".  I love that he enjoys science so much...taking after mom and dad a bit...

And, on to our next event.  We ended up having the birthday party at our house despite my wishes otherwise.  I tried to prepare but I wasn't on my "A Game".  Have a sick family for two weeks, traveling, celebrating Christmas and new Year's, preparing for my half marathon (an accidental 8.7 mile run the morning of the party since we got lost) and preparing for Stan to leave for a week...ummm...left me a little frazzled.

But, Katie and Tori stepped in and helped with the crafts...

Mr. and Mrs. Poley stepped in with the wine, complete with straw for easy slurping...

I got a few ideas from Pinterest...

And purchased my cupcakes at Target...

I think everyone ended up having a great time.

So thankful for this crowd...my neighbors!!!

Moo moo came, without her boys, who were also sick at home.  Boy, January has been a rough month for all us Coles!

Connor was supposed to spend the night with Moo, B and Cole, but due to illness...Nanny swooped in and took Connor so that Landon could have a birthday sleep over without his little brother.  What a trooper, that Nanny!

And Tori and Katie!!!  They even look happy to be stepping in and bailing this crazy mom out!

Oh, just singing with my sun umbrella...

One token Pinterest picture...

Zaiya decided to serenade us with the mermaid trumpet...

Tahti did some bonding with Connorbug too.  :)

Our Malvern crew!  I cannot believe how blessed we are to have this group to do life with...literally in our back yards (or front).  It is amazing to me how God placed all of us together.  Stan and I could not move, even if we wanted to, due to this awesome family we have in our neighbors.  Love you guys!

And, of course, we love our Smiths as well!!!  Too bad they can't join the neighborhood fun!

I think I have the same picture of Janise and Emelia from about 4 years ago...at the same spot.  My how time flies and little ones grow.  I love these sweet faces!

A group kid picture!  We resorted to singing "Wheels on the Bus" as we have often done in play group gatherings throughout the years.  Still works up to 8 years...and counting.

Um.  A typical Landon face, caught on film.  Exuberant? Emphatic? Enthusiastic? Lovely to parent?

And, now we are back in check...

And up to our old antics...

And there you have it.  I have an 8 year old.  Can hardly believe it!

Lindsay Jane had to post with me too.  She is such a little mama's girl.

And...she loves sweets, just like her mama.  :)  Can you believe that face?

After the festivities, Landon was allowed to have his three best pals spend the night.  He had Porter, JD and Sophia- all three friends with him since infancy.  It is just precious to me to see how these friendships have grown over the past 8 years.

Baseball paraphernalia from Tori and Katie!

8 dollars for turning 8 from Tahti and Zaiya!

Minecraft shirt and gift card from Moo, B and Cole!

Landon reading his card from JD.

Apparently, LJ thought it was quite hilarious.

Baseball and Skylander books from JD.

A homemade card and rocket from sweet Sophia.

Four goofballs...

Four goofballs and a little sister watching a movie with popcorn and m and m's.

Four goofballs playing Legos at 6:30am.  

Four goofballs and a little sister eating pancakes for breakfast.  :)

And, we never got to one game the night of the party.  So, we just played it the next morning...pin the ball on the baseball diamond.  ;)

And, little sister had to play too...

Did I mention these four were goofballs?

So, Landon is now eight and his birthday BLOG is done a mere 23 days later.  I tell you, I thought that when the kids "got a little older" I would "have more time to BLOG and journal".  What?  Not so.  But, I think that means I am focusing on the here and now as much as I can.  Parenting sure is tough work, but it is the most rewarding thing I have ever done.  Though I am not perfect, my parenting is not perfect, I may have (wink wink) lost my temper a few times...I am still the mom God chose for this little boy and I take that responsibility to heart.  I would do anything for Landon and his brother and sister as well.  I really believe that he knows that.

Happy Birthday to my eldest, my little buddy, our little space guy, "Gaga", our little fire cracker.  :)  Your mama loves you to the moon and back.