School Daze

Since Landon started Kindergarten I feel like I have been in somewhat of a daze.  I mean, I did have my Lindsay Jane 2 weeks into his first year of school, so I try to give myself a little bit of a break...but, for me, so far, school has been a game changer.

Landon has always adapted well socially to new situations, which has been a huge blessing as a mom.  At times it has been hard because he has not wanted to give me that last hug before rushing off to his first day of Kindergarten...but it has been great from the standpoint of being able to really see that he is secure and that he is ok when I drop him off.  I can only imagine leaving a crying child at school...I probably won't have to imagine when my Connorbug gets there, but that will be a post for another time.

Landon, however, has not enjoyed reading from the start.  Boo.  This child has been read to far more than my other two combined.  But, it is just not something he has loved to do himself...

Early on in his school year last year, his teacher met with me and told me about his reading and her viewpoint and that we would just keep encouraging him.  I have to admit...I cried.  Why?  I mean, it is ridiculous.  I think I realized (after weeding out a lot of baby hormones) that I had to let Landon be Landon.  After all, he is not a little me...who really enjoyed reading.

Things have continued this year with his struggle with liking to read...it has hit me again and even though I don't have those baby hormones flowing anymore, I have that mama sensitivity going and just want him to be great at everything.  And love it, while he is great at it.

I am learning a huge lesson right now.  Parenting is hard and each stage brings its challenges.  God has given me these three little ones and he has created them just the way they are.  And, he gave them each to me for a reason.  Many things are not turning out how I imagined.  But, isn't that how life is?

I find myself grabbing for books and seeking answers in how to help Landon when the books I need to go to are how to give myself grace for this journey...and in doing so, allow my children to be exactly who God made them to be whether that means they like and excel at reading or not.

Now there is a huge piece of this that I haven't mentioned...the "daze" part.  Since Landon started this schooling adventure, there has been homework, projects, plays, class parties, volunteer expectations, getting to know his school and everyone there as well as how they do things there.  There has been a lot of insecurity that I have had to deal with as I lose control...and entrust people I don't know to have my baby 5 days a week and to teach him.  There has also been an adjustment with our family routine as homework has to be factored into every evening...with 2 other children who have very real needs too.  

I have felt out of place at his school as I just don't know folks there and they don't know me...but I am leaving a part of my heart there every day.  It has caused a lot of growing pains for me.  I have really been out of my comfort zone, especially because I am not intimately involved in every detail...but God is.

Landon is loving to read "Splat the Cat" books, he is drawing closer to me and also closer to God as we pray together each morning before he goes to school.  He is very aware that God made him just the way he is and I really believe that this reading challenge has helped him to see that even more.  He is becoming the person God made him to be, apart from me.  I am learning to adapt and let go of some control and also love the place where Landon is right now.  We have had such wonderful opportunities to talk and to share feelings.  He has come to me for reassurance, which has been such a gift.

So, despite my daze, God has helped me to see the most important things clearly.  And it all goes back to his great love for me and every one of his precious little creations living under my roof.  I am so very thankful to have that daze sometimes so that I can know the difference between it and the clarity that God's truth brings.

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Now onto another little piece of my journey with my kids...Miss Kim.  Kim has been our sitter since Landon was a little fella and was our nanny for both Lindsay Jane and Connor.  Kim has been such an angel.  She quickly became a part of our family and has been a huge blessing as I have adapted to life with one, two and then three little ones.  Kim has connected with all three of our kids in such a special way.

She got a "big girl" job and moved to Charlotte on this past Saturday.  We are so very excited for her and her new endeavor, but what a loss for us.  It is worth taking a little time to share a few pictures where the love between these kids and Miss Kim can be felt.

I love the one above...because it is truly life.  And, Kim did life with us with these little nuts!  She really invested in Landon this past year in picking him up from the bus stop and doing his homework with him and his memory verses from clubs at church.  She was also very good at reigning him and his spirited self in...in a very very gentle manner.

We will miss Kim on a daily basis but we know she will be back to visit.  Boy, has her presence made the past 7 years a whole lot easier on this gal...and on my kids!

Thanks Miss Kim!!!

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I also thought it would be nice to see the benefit of having Landon in school.  I get to spend precious time with Lindsay Jane and Connor, time that I also spent with Landon.  These days do fly by, but we are enjoying digging in the dirt...

Riding on brother's dump truck..

Wearing our cowgirl boots

Cheering on the Tarheels...

Pushing brother's dump truck...

Playing dump trucks together..

Dressing up in Ninja gear to push said dump trucks...

Posing in Ninja gear...

Riding our other brother's dump truck...

Playing lightsabers with mommy...

And taking time to watch the slow emergence of each new season...

What a gift it is to be in this time in my life and to know the love of my heavenly Father...the only way I am fully able to see true joy and live into the truth that he is not done with me yet...

Snowy Heart Day!

Good thing we did Landon's Valentines early this year!  And good think mama planned an entire classroom party with coordination of parent volunteers, crafts, games and food for Feb. 13th, the day of the NC "blizzard".  Oye.  Oh, well.  What are you going to do?  We will reschedule the party and the crafts will be a little out of date but I think a group of first graders really won't care too much.  :)

Landon, intently, working on his Valentines.  He wanted to make his own again this year.  I find that so heart warming and just wonderful!  He also promised all of his classmates a rainbow loom bracelet...so you know what that means to this boy mom...mommy made 16 rainbow loom bracelets.  But, Landon did sit with me, pick the colors and he worked on his cards while I worked on the bracelets.  He told me, "This is the best part of my day, mommy, I love it when it is just you and me."  Heart-melting, again.  I AM doing something right.  :)

Finished baggies, ready for delivery!

Looming in progress...

C-bug, slipping in one extra for dear old mom.  At least he put the rubber bands on himself.  :)

Let me interject here...

Between those sweet pictures and the ones that follow...we had a NC "blizzard".  I mean, we really just kind of "poo-poo" the weathermen around here.  We heard we would get snow, but really we thought, probably an inch, nothing to keep us from going into work the morning before it would "arrive".

Lesson learned.

Mommy went to work and got stuck in gridlock traffic from 1:00-5:45 when I finally arrived home to my house that is a mere seven miles from my workplace.

Thankfully, my dear friend, Tori, was with me and is from PA.  She helped me to navigate and stay calm.  We talked and caught up, we counted our blessings...one of which was that we got behind a snow plow!!!  Yay!  We talked about parking my van and a) going to a hotel, b) walking home, c) braving it.  We opted for "braving it" and were so happy to get home!!!!

These smiling faces greeted me.  And, we made snow cream.  A fitting end to a crazy day!

Yummy!  Our first time ever!

Everyone loved it!  Esp. my Lindsay Jane.  I also had wine with mine...after that drive!

Then...the next day, we set out to enjoy our NC winter wonderland!  My little cutie could not sink in the snow because we had about an inch atop our 4 inches.  Not exactly the greatest combo for a mama with two rambunctious boys and a little 17 month old.  Anyone who has this spread knows what I am talking about and suffice it to say...these pictures show joy that was certainly there...but maybe only in these captured shots!  Mama really took one for the team, esp. "team mama's back" as little Miss Cole did not enjoy the snow.  I did make every effort to let her explore and as you can see, she did have some fun apart from my hip.  :)

See!  What joy!  Maybe it only lasted a few minutes at a time, but I think those few minutes were worth it!  I love this little pink puff ball!

I put her in her playhouse and that was enjoyable as she waved to me and giggled.  :)

Connorbug tried to do a snow angel.  Again...ice atop of snow...means, a 4 year old 45 pounder cannot make a snow angel, it was more like a snow butterfly.  But, he didn't mind.

Landon loved it!

My three cuties.  I love love this!

And this.

And this!  A little craziness with baby sis.

My sweet little snow bunny.

"Selfie" with mommy.  She was genuinely happy as long as she was at least this close to mama. :)  Really hard to be upset about being loved like that!

JD and Landon exploring.

Part two!  Amazing to look outside the window, instead of the car(!) and see this winter beauty!

Hot chocolate was a definite!  Snow cream followed as we had more fresh snow!  Yay!

And, the fresh snow enabled us to build a snowman!  A little funny...our neighbor's dog jumped up and ate this snowman's nose!

Connor decided to clean off the play house roof.

Daddy got involved and made one heck of a snowball!

Happy Happy boys with their daddy.  Their hero!

My dear neighbor, Sarah, took a turn at entertaining my Lindsay Jane.  Bless her.  Those smiles on Lindsay Jane and Rachel's faces just make me smile right back!  Adorable!

Holt got in on the fun too and made the middle of our soon to be snow man!  The best part of this picture, was that Holt was really belly laughing doing this.  He was so tickled at the huge snow ball that Stan had made.  It was so fun for all.  Snow...what a delightful pleasure of nature that us North Carolinians rarely get to experience.

Putting together our big snowman!

The snowman crew!

Cole family snowman 2014.

Connorbuggie resting on my bush...

Our house with our snowman!

Superimposed snowmen.  Someone in our house took some snow pictures and didn't switch back the camera to automatic...no names mentioned.  I guess it turned out pretty cool.

Another superimposed shot...Lindsay Jane was happy in the pool inside the igloo we were trying to make.  Hard to see in this one...

Unfortunately, the best shot I have of the igloo.  It was pretty cool and reminded me a lot of our igloo from my own childhood.  Of course, I lived in VA and the snow lasted a lot longer so our igloos were a labor of love for several days, not hours... :)

Then, back to inside to celebrate Valentine's Day!  Connor colored his Ninja Turtle poster.

Lindsay Jane loved mamas "Red Velvet Crinkle Cookies", one of my Valentine treats for my little loves.  :) She even signed "more" when she finished the first one.

Landon opening his cards from Moo and B and Pop and Mommom.

Lindsay Jane checking out her new Hello Kitty doll from Pop and Mommom and stickers from Moo and B.

And, as most of you know...our little one loves strawberries.  I mean, what better treat for Valentine's Day...red velvet cookies and strawberries!

We finished off our Valentine's Day with family movie night including pizza and "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs part 2".  It was a wonderful time.  It wasn't the Valentine's night Stan and I had planned.  We had instead planned to go to dinner and then our dance studio for their Valentine's dance.  Once again, our plans changed and we were with our three littles instead.  I found myself sitting there watching my three babies, loving this place I find myself.  Don't get me wrong...snow days are hard on a mama...esp. of three little ones, 2 of which are boys, but in all of the chaos, we made some amazing memories.

I don't regret the efforts it took to get all of those clothes on, sweating while waiting to go outside, holding a baby (26 pounder) on my hip for almost 2 days straight so my boys could enjoy the snow, making snow cream for the first time (ignoring my thoughts about pollution...), tying Valentine's Day in by making a new type of cookies, showering late at night after I worked out (that was the only chance as the kids were waiting to go outside at 7 a.m.!), making lemonade out of lemons and sharing a delightful dinner with our neighbors, catching up with my dear friend Tori in our 4 hour 45 minute commute home and having a really messy house thanks to all of the above!  We even found time to finish 2 chapter books, one with each boy.  Treasures abound as we look for them.  That's what I have to remember.  Happy Snowy Heart Day!